How Not To Sell Your House

In today’s edition of How Not to Sell Your House, I have a doozy.

Last week, we had hope! And then despair! And then more despair!

Remember  my “inspired” answer to prayers:“Madam, this is only a prelude to what you have to suffer.” Welp, it turns out that was pretty prophetic and things have definitely gone south. If you will recall, I really like the NORTH–The farther and whiter the better.

(At least our flowers look pretty)

On Tuesday, our realtor called to tell us we had not one but two people who were going to make an offer on the house, which is more than we ever could have dreamed at this point. And then not one, not two, but ZERO ended up making that offer.

On Wednesday, Jamie noticed our For Sale sign was stolen in broad daylight from our front lawn. Countless realtor friends have told me in all their years in real estate, they have never seen that happen. Welcome to our world. Our realtor has been on vacation and lives in Colorado Springs so Jamie had to spend almost five hours stuck in traffic to get another sign.

And then Friday was Denver’s first heat wave of the year with 95+degree temperatures. I came home from a wonderful and much-needed cooler day in the mountains where I went hiking with my friend Lisa before we picked our daughters up at Outdoor Lab.

Jamie greeted me at the door.

“Don’t swear.”

“Why would I swear?”

“Because of what I’m going to tell you. Our air-conditioning unit went out today.”

You mean that air conditioning unit that has worked perfectly fine the entire time we have lived here and chooses now to break down?

I didn’t swear. At least not out loud. That counts for something, right?

A $1,000+ fix later, we’re back in business.

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