Roller-blading and the damaged female psyche

I think I’m getting sick and have been up half the night. This is exceedingly frustrating because I have a hike and lunch planned today and three Halloween parties in the works for the little Boo on Friday and Saturday. The only advantage of getting sick would be to get out of painting the den with Jamie this weekend. Surely, he wouldn’t drag his dear wife out of her deathbed and subject her to paint fumes, would he?

I’ve had a few folks e-mail and ask what I meant by “it wasn’t pretty” during my roller-blading experience yesterday. I guess it’s confession time. Y’see, since moving to Colorado, I haven’t found a great place to blade. I finally spotted a new trail leading up the canyon to Golden a few weeks ago. I thought the sulphuric Coors factory was the only drawback; I was wrong.

I started out strong. Smooth, powerful strokes. I was completely alone on the trail, which I love. But then I encountered hill #1. No problem. My pace slowed a bit but I triumphantly summited. Then came Hill #2, then #3.

All was fine and dandy until it came time to turn around. But then came the “Ohhhhhhhh fudge” (I blame Ralphie in The Christmas Story). During my jubilation of conquering the trail, I hadn’t realized how truly steep my ascent was. For those who have ever been on roller-blades, stopping while careening 100 miles an hour down a hill can be problematic. For me, it proved to catastrophic. Because in addition to the steep hills, there were also signs everywhere with the squiggly arrow (the official road-sign term, I’m sure). You know, the one that says “You’re dead if you don’t follow the hairpin curves.”

The rest of the story was not pretty. What ticks me off is do you think anyone witnessed my triumphant ascent? Nooooooooo. But now bikers started coming out of the woodwork as I desperately clutched the railing, my legs wedged in a snow-plow…errr..asphalt-plow. In the end, I only suffered a few scrapes and a bruised ego. But worry not for I shall live to blade another day…and bruise a few other egos along the way!

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