Jamie on how to destroy icons

EASTER BUNNY: BEWARE.

Do not hop on by our house. Hunky Hubby is ticked at all your species for crapping all over our yard your feces, digging holes and eating his precious garden. He has been teaching his innocent daughter how to terminate and destroy you. Because she’s just that fast.

Of course, Haddie has yet to associate Said Species with the same that will be showering her with chocolate and jelly beans in a few short weeks. So you’ll probably be safe. For now.

(Photo caption: Little Bunny Haddie during more cuddly times.)

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Speaking of lies we tell our children, Jamie and I recently discussed the ramifications of believing in Santa. We both agree that while we don’t put a ton of emphasis on it, there is something magical about the fantasy that a fat guy in a red suit can satisfy our innermost wishes.

Jamie: “If you think about it, so many people make Santa such a taboo thing but no one seems too interested in shooting down the fact that so many of our kids’ favorite characters aren’t real. I find it hypocritical that parents encourage children to believe in Elmo but make Santa out to be the bad guy.”

Amber: “Gee, I can’t wait to hear the reasoning behind this one.”

Jamie: “Yeah, imagine if we told them Elmo wasn’t real and was just a puppet who has a hand stuck up his butt.”

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The Sound of Music is my all-time favorite movie and I have an immeasurable amount of respect and admiration for Julie Andrews’ talent.

Mary Poppins was on television recently and while it’s not one of my favorites, I was drawn to watch some of it. Mostly, I just wanted to watch her float out of the sky with her umbrella, conjuring up similar fantasies that I, too will be rescued from these children by a magical nanny. I’m still waiting.

Anyway, as she was belting out a song whilst cleaning up the toy room with the children, I marveled at her.

“You know Jamie. They just don’t make actresses like Julie Andrews these days. She is so classic, so timeless and so classy. She really defies all the trash we see today.”

“I think I saw her toples$ in a movie once.”

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