When your daughter conspires with the enemy

I went through two horrendously awkward years. The unfortunate thing about it was I had no idea just how goofy I looked. In fact, I thought I was Queen Bee and gosh darn it if I wasn’t at the top of my class in academics and sports in fifth and sixth grade.

It’s just my appearance that was severely lacking.

Frizzy hair? Check.

Geek glasses? Check.

Tacky ’80s clothes? Check.

I have justifiably burned most pictures from those years but my brothers have held onto a few gems for blackmail purposes (my brother Jade posted the above picture on Facebook a couple of years ago).

During my courtship with Jamie, I lived in Salt Lake City while he was in Denver.  When we got engaged, Jade dug into his secret stash and sent one of said Horrendous Pictures to Jamie. And being the horrid person that he is, he enlarged one of them, attached a “Welcome Home” sign and taped it to the front door the first time I ever came to his condo.

Jamie claims he could hear my blood-gurgling scream from the hallway.

When I was in Calgary over the summer, I went through some old boxes containing church manuals and magazines. I was thrilled when I discovered this treasure that was given to my mom by her beloved mother.

I love the inscription; Grandma always had such beautiful handwriting.

“Dear Chris, I hope you enjoy the book for your family home evening lessons. Love, Mother.”

My family loves snuggling up and reading the scriptures every night so I asked my mom if I can could carry on this tradition. What I love about this book is it is beautifully illustrated but also contains real scriptural passages (versus being summarized/paraphrased). I think it’s so important for kids to learn to understand scriptural language vs. just the stories because there is power and a strong spirit behind it.

So, what does this have to do with Hadley? As we were settling down to read the scriptures, I discovered something inserted into the book lo-and-behold, it was my seventh grade class picture. I was at the tail end of the geek years–I’d chopped my hair and the following year I got contact lenses so I was almost quasi-cool.

I won’t mention the trauma of how my mom liked my asymmetrical cut so much she got the identical style.

Hadley squealed, grabbed the picture and said, “I MUST DO SOMETHING WITH THIS!”

Even my sweet Bode turned against me. “Did you really look like that?”

I only wish I was dressed up for Halloween, Dude.

All was forgotten until I returned to my bedroom and discovered Hadley’s creation.

Now I’m just waiting for Fat Kitty to turn against me.

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