Bode | Life Elevated Mom

Halloween 2012: The Slime Bucket, Digging for Eyeballs and the Pumpkin’s Celebrity Encounter

November 2, 2012 by Amber

This year, Jamie was delighted when The Great Pumpkin had an encounter with celebrity. TaRhonda Thomas of 9News fame was at our house interviewing me for an unrelated story and was flabbergasted with what she found when she pulled up to the house. And unlike some broadcast journalists I’ve worked with in the past (read: snobby), she’s every bit as fun and lovely as she appears in the picture.

One of the bonuses of having kids at different schools is they had their Halloween parties at different times so I was able to give each of them my undivided attention. I started with little B. The volunteers were divided up into different stations. The Room Mom asked if I wanted to do the craft.

“Err, no thanks,” I politely declined.
“Really? You look like the crafty type,” she responded.

I assure you that’s the first time THAT has ever happened.

I instead volunteered for the messy slime bucket, which was green jello that was refrigerated with plastic body parts. To demonstrate, I stuck my hand in it and pretended it was getting devoured. What’s Halloween without a bit of traumatizing?

For Dorothy’s party, she was thrilled she was the kid who got to put the finishing touches on her teacher’s mummy wrap and did a muzzle over her mouth.
I’m sure she was thinking, “That’s for all that miserable math homework.”

They did plenty of crafts and games and once again, I volunteered for the messiest of them all (sensing a pattern here?): Searching for eyeballs (marbles) in a mass of brains (spaghetti) with their feet. Disgusting. Especially when the brains got accidentally flicked down my shirt.

That evening, we met at our fire station where they handed out drinks, cupcakes, cookies, free HarperCollins children’s books and then a fire truck led a parade.

From the archives: 3-yr-old Bode at the parade. #Love

Our neighborhood pretty much rocks Halloween.

This is the first year we’ve been able to carve The Great Pumpkin because it’s usually rotting down the driveway. Since the weather was so nice (it’s been 70 degrees), we sat on the porch to hand out candy and could hear the stunned reactions of the trick-or-treaters. A large crowd was usually congregated around the pumpkin to take pictures. The Pumpkin Man was in his element.

Our neighbor Steve told us his wife Angella took a picture of their family with The Great Pumpkin. She’s a pharmaceutical rep and made it into a card to hand out to various doctor’s offices and clients. He said it was an awesome conversation-starter and opened a lot of doors.

Next year, I’m demanding a commission.

Filed Under: 9News, Bode, Hadley, holidays, Humor, pumpkins Tagged With: 9News, Halloween

Mother of the Year Advice: How to comfort a child

November 1, 2012 by Amber

On Sunday morning, I found sweet Bode melted down in a pool of tears in my bathroom. I had sent him in there to scrub off his Mario mustache from our ward Halloween party the previous night. His attempts were in vain.
“I CAN’T GET IT OFF, MOMMY.”
“Oh, don’t worry, Sweetie. You won’t be the first 6-year-old to go to church with a mustache!”

Filed Under: Bode, Humor Tagged With: Halloween

Apple Dunking and Halloween Bashing!

October 31, 2012 by Amber

Saturday was our ward’s annual Halloween party. The youth were in charge, which means as a youth leader I was a part of the planning and implementation.
Pretty much, I have the best calling ever working with these beautiful young women.

Jamie and I wore our annual costumes. I was the pumpkin widow dressed in black (see my shirt) and Jamie was (what else?) a pumpkin.
It’s like art imitating real life. Every. Single. Day.

We just finished reading the 100th Anniversary edition of Wizard of Oz that I bought as a souvenir in Coronado Island. Much to my delight, Hadley shunned the pop culture costumes of many of her peers and opted to be Dorothy.

Bode, on the other hand? He spotted a Mario costume at the thrift store and the begging began. “Bode, you were Mario two years ago. Don’t you want to be _______” and I listed off a number of costumes. Obviously, I lost.

Blurry action shot eating doughnuts on a string

We had a spookiest appetizer/dessert contest so I whipped up a graveyard 7-Layer Dip. I got a ton of compliments on it but it was a result of improvisation. We didn’t have any refried beans so I used Madras Lentils (my fave wintertime lunch) and layered sour cream, cheese, green onions, salsa and guacamole. For the graveyard, I cut and baked some red chile tortillas into tombstones, a cat and a ghost.
I thought I did a pretty good job until I saw my friend Wendy’s entry.
Overachiever.

The young men were in charge of a haunted grove in the forest behind the church.

Teenagers with a real chainsaw = terrifying.

The young women stayed inside and oversaw all the carnival games.

Best. Bean bag toss. Ever.

And then there was the most unsanitary game of them all: bobbing for apples. In sixth grade, I had a Halloween party that will go down in infamy as The Best Party Ever and I still wear my Queen Apple Bobber Badge proudly. When the young women taunted me to do it, I rose to the challenge.

Or rather, bent way, way over for it. Haddie and Bode joined me and I dove in preparing to leave them in my salivated-apple-bobbing wake. When all of a sudden, I was being submerged way way way under. I flew up sputtering, only to realize my own husband dunked me.

It’s a good thing we drove separately; otherwise dude would have walked home.

Haddie ended up being the winningest apple bobber of the night. As it turns out, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.

Literally.

Filed Under: Bode, Foodie, Hadley, holidays, Humor, Jamie, LDS, pumpkins Tagged With: Halloween, recipe

When Mom Has a Warped Sense of Humor

October 17, 2012 by Amber

In case you haven’t seen the hilarious article from CBS news that documents numerous candids of terrified people in a haunted house, you need to go there now!

http://www.cbsnews.com/2300-504784_162-10014097.html

See? I told you!

Last night, the kiddos and I were getting a kick out of all the pictures and I had a brilliant idea. Remember that YouTube video of a casual drive in the countryside that ended badly? (Don’t want to spoil it if you haven’t seen it).

Welp, I plopped the kiddos in front of it and tried to video their reactions. Sadly, it didn’t record but their response left an indelible imprint on me. Both were startled and then Haddie started laughing while Bode looked like he was going to cry. “MOMMY!” he yelled.

It gets better. That night when we said our prayers, Hadley (the melodramatic one) pleaded with the Powers On High to not have nightmares thanks to the video. That’s when an instantaneous plan was hatched. Upon her “Amen,” I jumped out screaming, freaking the gourd out of both of them.

I’d like to think God has a sense of humor.

I know Bode sure didn’t.

Filed Under: Bode, Hadley, Humor

The road to popularity is paved in orange

October 9, 2012 by Amber

Popularity is elusive. Some think you need to wear the right clothes. Or have the right friends. Or it’s all about your parent’s connections.

Last Monday, my kids learned the key to their popularity: showcase an orange monstrosity to your friends. Yep, that’s all it takes. I took The Great Pumpkin to both of my kids’ schools and it was a HIT.

First stop was Hadley. Coincidentally, it was her school’s fun run fundraiser so I caught a glimpse of her.

In Action.

Inaction.

She did 14 laps, which equaled 3.5 miles–waaaay more than I thought she’d do. And it made me regret I didn’t pledge a lump sum but tried to motivate her by donating per lap.

I’ll know better next time. #PoorHouse

Jamie stayed for a little while but had to get back to work, which was a shame because he loves nothing better than catering to his adoring fans. And believe me, there were many. The entire school needed to walk by The Great Pumpkin on their way back to class.

Haddie did a great job explaining the ins and outs of pumpkin growing to her third graders.

And judging from a couple of the boys’ gaga reactions, she also cemented a few crushes. She’s cute and grows huge pumpkins? That’s hot.

Then, it was off to Bode’s school where all three first-grade classes came to check it out.

He did a fantastic job talking about his growing strategy, after which we opened it up for questions. Big mistake. While most kids were great, there was one little boy I couldn’t get to quiet down. After about a minute of expounding upon what he’d do if he had a giant pumpkin, I tried to move on by talking over him.

And he kept talking. I kept ignoring him until finally, he shouted, “I AM NOT FINISHED YET!”

Believe me, I was.

At the end of the day when I picked up Bode from the bus stop, I asked him:

“So, what did your friends say about the pumpkin?”

“They thought it was cool. I was second in line to come home and the boy at the front gave up his spot to me and said, ‘You have a big pumpkin so you can be first.'”

As far as the first-grade pecking order goes, that’s as good as it gets.

Filed Under: Bode, Hadley, Humor, pumpkins

The Children’s Division–Or Would That Be “Division Among the Children?”

October 3, 2012 by Amber

At the Great Pumpkin’s weigh-off, the children’s division is almost an after-thought. “Ahh, look at the cute little pumpkins! Hurry them through and let’s get on to the big daddies.”

This year was the exception.

The rules are the pumpkins need to be dropped off well in advance of the competition. The children’s started at 10 a.m. and the adults were supposed to follow at 11 a.m. Much to my annoyance (as one who HATES when people/events are late), this event has never started on time.

At 10 a.m., Hadley and Bode had the only pumpkin in the children’s division. Then 10:15 a.m., 10:30 a.m. By 10:45 a.m., we started doing our victory lap but no, wait! Our arch nemesis from years past showed up with three humdinger pumpkins. Meaning: HUGE.

The kids had not noticed their competition so we settled back, waiting for it to begin. When we saw the first pumpkin that was going to scale, Hadley was unimpressed.

“Wow, that’s small,” she scoffed.

I tried to shush her but not before the mohawked kid and his brother in front of us turned around without missing a beat and snarled, “That’s my pumpkin.”

“And it’s a very nice one,” I assured him before lecturing Hadley about being a good sport. Turns out, she needed that lecture because out of the five pumpkins, hers was among the smallest.

To build suspense, pumpkins are measured from smallest to largest and Hadley and Bode’s was next. They were excited about the results: 203 pounds. And a great-looking pumpkin to boot!

But they didn’t win. In fact, there were three kids from the same family whose pumpkins got progressively bigger. By the time they got to the largest pumpkin–from a 5-year-old girl–the pumpkin was a foot taller than she was.

“622 pounds!” Jamie (the MC) announced.

Now, that’s impressive for any grower but common consensus was there was no way a kindergartner who couldn’t remember what city she was from could have grown it. The dad even later later it slip that they were all his pumpkins.

Disconcerting? Sure. The father should have just entered them in the adult competition and he still would have beat out half the competition. And it wasn’t that little girl’s fault–I’m sure she didn’t put herself up to it.

Haddie is a perceptive one. “I don’t think she did it by herself. In fact, I’m 100 percent sure she didn’t.”

Regardless of the fairness of the situation, there was a lesson to be learned. “It doesn’t matter,” I consoled. “Sometimes things just aren’t fair. But you got fourth place and you grew a really great pumpkin. That is something to be proud of.”

When the ribbons were handed out, I insisted they cheer for their competitors. Hadley begrudgingly obliged but mild-mannered Bode had been nursing a brutal blister from the monkey bars.

“I can’t,” he contested. “It hurts too much to clap.”

I couldn’t have agreed more, Little Dude.

Filed Under: Bode, Hadley, pumpkins

And The Great Pumpkin’s Weight Is….

September 30, 2012 by Amber

Yep, 837 pounds! (Check-out Jamie’s blog denverpumpkins.com for specs).

Though last year’s pumpkin weighed almost 100 pounds more, Jamie was pleased with the result. Growers have enormous tape measures and based on the measurements, Jamie’s pumpkin should have weighed about 770 pounds but it went 9 percent heavy.

Look at me with my pumpkin-geek speak. Impressed?

Though there were a few pumpkins with larger circumferences, Jamie passed them to place a surprising fourth.

The kiddos also placed fourth in a somewhat contested children’s division. More on that later (and how Haddie smack-talked the mohawk kid) but they were pleased with their 203-pounder.

When we first arrived, I had a nice woman come up to me who recognized me from my Denver Post articles about Jamie’s pumpkin obsession.

Still trying to figure out if that was a good thing?

And Jamie, of course, is a local celebrity with references to our NBC Marriage Ref appearance being thrown around. Beauty queen Mrs. Littleton even made a celebrity appearance!

Umm, OK.

While Jamie was busy doing his pumpkin business, the kiddos and I delved into the activities at Jared’s Giant Pumpkin Weigh-off and Festival that included a bouncy castle, face painting and balloon animals.

A maze….

Water balloon sling shots,

And, of course, an obscene amount of oversized pumpkins and vegetables.


Cool pear!

1st place pumpkin

Jamie’s buddy Joe Scherber took first place with a pumpkin that was taping out to more than 1,400 pounds–a new Colorado record. Sadly, it went really light and *only* weighed 1,225 pounds.

Something that made me chuckle: Pumpkins allegedly lose several pounds of weight after they are cut from the vine so many growers wrap bags of water around the stem to help maintain their moisture. Scherber took it a step further and if you look closely at the pumpkin, you can see bags with yellow liquid. The contents? Gatorade.

Who knew pumpkins were athletes?

Following the day’s festivities, Jamie took us out for a celebratory dinner on the deck of Blue Canyon Grill in Golden.

But the true highlight for us all? Driving the streets with an 837-pound pumpkin in tow. People were hooping and hollering at us, delighted to catch a glimpse of such an anomaly. As we waved back at everyone, I marveled at our quirky family where oversized gourds and crazy trips are the norm.

And I couldn’t have been more grateful.

Next time: the smack-talkin’ in the children’s division weigh-off. Oh, the controversy.

Filed Under: Bode, Hadley, Humor, Jamie, pumpkins

The juggling game and Bode’s injury

September 12, 2012 by Amber

Our school year is in full swing and we’ll really kick things into gear as Haddie starts swim team and piano this week. We’re new to this whole after-school juggling scene and though I’ve made the goal to not overschedule the kids with more than one activity, I can see how easy it is to do.

Or rather, hard. I look at some of my friends who turn into after-school chauffeurs as they shuttle kids around and I’m really trying to carve out a significant amount of time for them to just play and do their homework.

In addition to life’s regular chaos, we’re also entering pumpkin weigh-off season and our annual pumpkin party. I also have some travels lined up that include a press trip to California, Haddie’s three-day camping trip to Mesa Verde and then I was asked to speak at the Governor’s Tourism Conference in Steamboat Springs.

Poor, poor Jamie who will be holding down the fort.

But we had a swell weekend! A wonderful family in our ward invited us over for authentic Bolivian food (delish) and we’ve promised to return the favor next month good old-fashioned American grub.

Still trying to figure out just what that will entail?

Then, there’s our annual pilgrimage to the Arvada Harvest Festival. This year, the kiddos opted to blow their entire allowance on the hamster balls.

And yes, they said it was totally worth it.

Then, Bode had his first soccer game of the season. He lost some of his confidence last spring as the teams grew more competitive and we tried to tell him his days of scoring nine goals in a game are over.

This time, he scored one and he was pretty happy about it.

And then we attended a S’mores Party. Many of our besties were there and we had a great time. The only problem was I discovered I have deep-rooted marshmallow-roasting issues. I freaked out as the kiddos raced around with their skewers of flaming marshmallows.

When I was a kid, we were camping when my cousin Fraser’s marshmallow caught on fire. He flipped it over to blow it out but the flaming marshmallow landed straight in his eye. Were it not for a doctor camping next to us, who knows what would have happened.

This is just a nice way of saying I have issues with kids + flaming marshmallows and was internally FREAKING out. So, I kind of got a kick out of Sam (the hostess) putting these with the spread of s’mores:

What I didn’t anticipate: it would be my kid who’d need them. A few minutes after snapping a picture of the Bandaids, Bode limped over to me.

“I’m hurt!” He exclaimed. I looked down and his knee was oozing in blood. I rushed him into the house and he was surprisingly calm. In fact, as we were passing his friend, he calmly explained,

“Alex, I am not able to play for a little bit because I am bleeding.”

Nice to know we have one level-headed person in our family.

Filed Under: Bode, Humor

Why I cannot be reincarnated as Bode

September 7, 2012 by Amber

I don’t believe in reincarnation but like to tease my kids how good they have it.

Me: “In my next life, I’m coming back as Bode.”
Him: “You can’t do dat!”
Me: “Why not?”

Reading to captive audience Fat Kitty

I then waited for the kid’s doctrinal profundities on how it wasn’t even possible. It didn’t happen because he countered with this reason:

Him: “YOU CAN’T EVEN PLAY WII!”

Filed Under: Bode, Humor Tagged With: Nintendo

Let’s hear it for the boy (and girl)

August 31, 2012 by Amber

Thursday was one of those (rare-ish) days when you think, maybe I’m not such a complete failure as a mom and these kids are turning out OK.

And it happened on a day I was pretty down-and-out with the flu and a killer sinus infection. So pathetic was I that even slothful Fat Kitty ditched me because I was too boring just lying around.

Now, that’s pathetic.

For starters, Haddie brought me fresh-squeezed orange juice that she’d squeezed with her own two hands. Then, the first thing she did when she got home from school was prepared me a snack of cinnamon toast and fresh strawberries. But here’s the kicker: she did it before she ate.

If you have ravenous, sometimes egocentric kiddos like mine, you’ll realize just how amazing that is.

Then, Jamie forwarded me a message that Bode’s teacher left on our voicemail (Vonage sends an email transcript). She is the nicest lady and I wouldn’t be surprised if she had called a number of students (if not all) to give positive affirmations about her kids. Here’s what she raved about Bode:

Hi Mr. and Mrs. Johnson, it’s Bode’s teacher Jenny and I was just calling to let you know what a joy Bode as he is been doing such a fantastic job this week. He is an excellent listener. He is sitting just like he should in crisscross applesauce. He’s raising his hand and adding some of the most insightful comments I have ever heard from a first grade student so I just wanted to let you know that he is just a joy to have in class and that you’ve raised such a fabulous young man.

It’s so neat to have a leader in the classroom for my other students to see what it looks like to be a first grader and to be a listener and to be thinking all the time. So I just wanted to let you know what a joy he is. If you need anything please let me know and again thank you for raising such a fabulous young man and I will talk to you soon.

So, even though I’m down in the dumps I’m feeling pretty darn grateful today.

Fat Kitty rejection and all.

Filed Under: Bode, Hadley