Two weeks and counting….

A few random, disconnected updates today.

1) Bode’s two-week appointment was yesterday and he checked out maaaavelously. Not only has he regained what he lost in the hospital, but The Slug (as he became known) has already gained half an ounce. Good to know these explosive mammaries are good for something. He also showed early signs of genius when he spoke his first three words. Vehemently. His profundities occurred when they stuck a needle in his foot and he screeched “WORST! PAIN! EVER!” Poor kid. He even included the exclamation marks in his statement.

2) I am enjoying having a boy more than I ever imagined. Admittedly, I had an aversion to getting peed on and boys, as you know, aim and fire. But I am indulging his feminine side in a way that would make Hunky Hubby cringe: by putting Vaseline on his little lips and lotion on his legs. And there isn’t any kicking and screaming. In fact, I think he kind of likes it and assures me it is absolutely no threat to his manhood. Unlike other men I know.

3) A parent is proud of their child under different circumstances during their lives: their first day of kindergarten, their first ‘A’ in school, their first goal in soccer. I reached one of these milestones with Hadley the other day when Jamie was coughing away, coughing without covering his mouth.

The Hurricane walked up to him, put her arm up to her mouth and did a fake cough to demonstrate how to politely do it. She then attempted to cover Jamie’s mouth with his arm. When he stubbornly refused, she grabbed every single one of her stuffed animals and showed Daddy how they do it. FYI, Big Bird was the only one whose arm/wing was not long enough to cover his mouth. Just in case you were wondering. I always suspected he was lacking in social graces.

4) Thanks for all the advice on the explosive mammaries. I went the cabbage leaves route and they have worked wonders. The only drawback is that after a few hours when they’ve appropriately molded to said mammaries, they start to, well, mold. I’m trying to get beyond the stench and have to put a pillow on my chest whilst sleeping. Because I just wouldn’t be me if I didn’t have any sleep issues.

Also, I’m not sure what’s more offensive. When I first put them on and Hunky Hubby told me he suddenly had a craving for coleslaw or the fact that he now calls me his little sauerkraut.

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