The good and bad news of our hospital stint (pun intended)

If I ever write a book, the title will be, “You can’t make this stuff up.”

Jamie was once again in the hospital for chest pain this week. On Tuesday night, he had meetings at the church and I asked him to drop off something.

“I probably can’t.”
“Why not?”
“I think I need to go to the ER,” he casually informed me.

He then revealed he’s been having chest pain since FRIDAY but never said anything because he knew I’d freak and make him go to the hospital and he would have missed his pumpkin party and weigh-off.

Death vs. a pumpkin party? Priorities.

And so they admitted him Tuesday night. We knew they wouldn’t be able to do anything until the next morning and that he’d need an angiogram. The nurse told him it was OK to eat breakfast so imagine how pleased he was to have the cardiologist come in a few minutes later to inform him he couldn’t eat before the procedure, that he now had to wait six hours, and that they were so backed up they probably wouldn’t be able to get him in until the next day.

This news did not go over well with me, in large part due to the already-overwhelming medical bills we’re paying off. There was NO WAY I was paying for an extra day in the hospital due to THEIR screw-up.

I was still at home at that point so I made some calls. They were not pleasant but apparently my loving threats hit home because 20 minutes later, Jamie called me.

“You contacted the hospital, didn’t you?!”
“How did you know?”
“They just informed me they found an opening for 3 p.m. today.”

Sometimes it pays off to be me.

The findings? When Jamie had surgery back in February, there were three arteries that were almost completely blocked as a result of his chemo radiation treatments he had in his late-20s. For two of the main arteries, they were able to put stints. The third artery is a smaller branch off the main and due to its position and size, they were unable to do anything with it. The only possible solution to open it up is bypass surgery and at this point, they don’t want to go there.

Believe me, neither do I.

And so they think it’s that darned third artery that is causing the chest pain. Because it’s not a main artery, they’re not overly concerned about it but if the pain continues they’ll reevaluate. They hope by switching up his meds, they can help him manage the pain.

So, I guess it’s a bit of good news (the stints in the main arteries are fine) and bad news (there’s nothing we can do about the blocked third artery). We hope Jamie will return home today.

I’ve got to say once again how grateful I am for our awesome friends and family and their outpouring of support. Whether it’s watching the kids, bringing us dinners or just offering to help in anyway they can, I am so humbled by everyone’s support. And I’m hoping that someday soon we can return the favor.

Read: Cease from being charity cases.

The kids and I spent most of Wednesday afternoon and evening in the hospital, with a quick trip to the nearby pumpkin farm while Jamie was doped up in recovery. I’ve become disarmingly comfortable in a hospital setting this year but what I was not prepared for: Jamie’s celebrity status.

As two nurses were wheeling Jamie into surgery, he managed to worked it into the conversation that he grows giant pumpkins. Both of the women scrutinized him, turned to me, recognized The Hair and exclaimed, “You were on The Marriage Ref!” Jamie then delighted his captive audience.

It didn’t stop there. Following his surgery, his new nurse not only remembered him from six months ago (horrors to be considered a “regular” in the cardiac unit) but also from TV.

It was my worst nightmare on many levels.:)

But here’s for hoping we’ll be able to once again pick up where we left off and start running again today.

The resurrection of the kindergarten debate

I know, I know. I am overdue on posting about our pumpkin festivities last weekend. And that will happen just as soon as I wade through my onslaught of deadlines, laundry, meetings and hikes. Yes, people. I am going on my very first hike today following my knee surgery.

It should set me back about a week.

However, I couldn’t delay on posting about an article I read regarding the scientific findings of kindergarten. Yes, kindergarten is a science. Or rather, the delay of starting it can be. If you will recall, last year I had some angst regarding whether I should start Bode on time or delay him like so many parents in Colorado are prone to do. I obviously went with my gut and enrolled him on time and I couldn’t be happier that I did.

Especially after these findings that are sure to ruffle a few feathers. So, come weigh-in and let me know what you think!

Let the (Pumpkin) Games Begin!

This is THE weekend Chez Johnson. Tonight is the ceremonial vine-cutting party where we will devour all things pumpkin.

Jamie insisted on putting the “As Seen on TV” logo on the invitation.

Because he’s prideful like that.

And Saturday is The Great Pumpkin weigh-off at Jared’s Nursery in Littleton! In addition to pumpkin growers who are out of their gourds over-sized gourds, there will be a kid’s costume parade, dog costume contest, pumpkin drop, chili cook-off, free straw maze, bouncy castle, petting zoo, Galleria of Ghouls and much more. Details at JaredsGarden.com.

Lest you’re confused as to why and how we’re still participating in the weigh-off after the pumpkin’s demise, Jamie has been fastidiously calking the crack. Though he cannot officially enter “Ricky” in the weigh-off, his fingers are crossed it will hold together long enough to get an official weight.

Here’s the latest shot of the pumpkin if you want to wager your own guess. Jamie had our neighbors pose because our kids are getting too big and he wants to make the pumpkin appear larger than it actually is.

Because he’s prideful like that.

Wish him luck!

One of the many reasons I love my dad

It finally feels like Fall in Colorado and after a long, hot summer this is the time of year I enjoy the most. Well, with the exception of winter’s glorious snow. And who doesn’t love spring blossoms?

OK, mostly I just hate summer’s heat.

As a part of my physical therapy, I’ve been trying to bike daily. Though I don’t yet feel I’m ready to hike, my knee is getting stronger every day. Yesterday, I biked for over an hour and was delighted, upon summiting a large hill on the Ralston Creek Trail, to have a vantage point of two gorgeous lakes.

But even better was I actually passed a young dude on the trail, evidence I’m finally gaining some speed. “This is the stretch that always gets me,” he mumbled as an excuse. “Yeah, me too!” I breathed as I raced by.

Or not.

Dear ol’ dad posted the following as his Facebook status last weekend:

Passed these two teenagers pushing their mountain bikes up the Southland Drive hill.

’70-year-old guy passing on your left,’ said I.

‘Heh, heh,’ said they in obvious humiliation.

Just in case you’re wondering where I get “it” from.

The year that kicked our butts

I’ll admit it: I came into 2011 with a sense of pending doom. I’m not a negative gal so I’d like to think it was a premonition that this year would basically suck. I mean, it wasn’t all bad. We went on a Disney Cruise, took loads of fun ski trips and spent July in Canada.

See? That’s what an optimist does–tries to put on a positive spin.

But there’s no “spinning” the onslaught of medical bills we have from Jamie’s heart surgery, his chronic rheumatism problems, my chest pains and knee surgery. Not to mention the BBQ and refrigerator we had to replace, the car problems and the second set of phones that are on the fritz. Oh, and last week? The Internet was down for two days and Jamie’s computer was on the brink of death.

He is a web developer who works from home. One might say his computer is kind of important.

So, our big expense last week was a new computer.

Good-bye, Christmas presents. It was nice (not) knowing you.

Even with this humdinger of a year, I still recognize we’ve been blessed. We’ve been fortunate that Jamie’s business is going well (hence the 12-hour days) and that my parents made a generous charitable donation to help offset the cost of my knee surgery.

Because make no mistake: we are charity cases these days.

Last week, we attended the preview of the Denver Museum of Nature and Science’s new T.Rex Encounter exhibit. The kids had a blast but it wasn’t until we posed for a picture with a super-imposed dinosaur on a blue screen that I got the symbolism:

T.Rex = 2011.

Better luck in 2012.

A Soccer Superstar is Born

Bode is a great little soccer player and usually scores 1-2 goals per game but he’s no superstar.

At least until Saturday.

While I was at a blogging conference, Jamie, Hadley, Uncle Chris and Aunt Lisa cheered him on….
….to score lots of goals. Aunt Lisa shot this 17-second video of Goal # 6:

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AprgDuGK4Mk?hl=en&fs=1]
Bode Soccer video

Now, I’m a competitor but after saaaaaay goals 4 and 5, I might have made the suggestion that he should ease up.

Jamie, on the other hand, does not have that gene.

Bode went on to score NINE GOALS.

To help motivate the kids, we issued the rule they’d get a candy bar for each goal they scored.

Bode’s sugar high should last until Halloween.

Spontanaeity at its Worst

Hadley and I are the spontaneous ones in our little family.

This is just a nice way of saying we give our boys ulcers.

But yesterday, Hadley was a bit too spontaneous for even me. At 7:30 a.m., she announced, “Let’s bike to school today!”

This is no small feat. When we had our assessment testing before school started, we tested the waters by biking there and between going up hills, crossing busy streets and traversing the soccer fields, it took us about 25 minutes.

I had been wanting to bike to school before chilly temperatures kicked in and with rain in the forecast later in the week, I agreed, “Let’s do it!”

Sleepy Bode looked at us like we were both lunatics and he was correct. School starts at 8:15 a.m. so we had just 15 minutes to finish getting ready. But we somehow did it and were on our way.

Until we biked up to the top of our hill and I realized we’d forgotten their backpacks.

“Wait here,” I gasped as I raced back to the house. When we reconnected, I knew we wouldn’t have even one moment to spare. Bless their hearts, they pushed onward and had a lovely ride on that beautiful September morning.

Well, with the exception we were in a bit of a frenzy when we arrived mere moments before the bell rang (because stressed and frazzled is an ideal way for any kid to start school).

Now, the following is a glimpse at how I don’t think things through. I had originally intended to go for a bike ride in our local open space that morning and did just that. I had a lovely time and even ran into my friend Lisa.

That would have been dandy if it ended there but then it was time to bike back to school to retrieve Bode from half-day kindergarten an hour later. We stopped at the nearby playground and skate park for a picnic before climbing the big hill to our house. Then a few hours later, I had to repeat the same process by biking back to school to pick-up Hadley and climbing our big hill for the third time that day.

Remember my knee surgery I had two weeks ago today?

Maybe by Spring I’ll be ready to be spontaneous again.

The game’s winners and losers

Last weekend’s winners

1) Partying it up at the Arvada Harvest Festival’s fun booths and midway.

We were really just in it for the over-sized turkey legs.

2) Bode’s first soccer game of the fall season. The little dude is a master dribbler and scored two goals.

He actually got three but the sore losers on the other team said it didn’t count because they weren’t ready yet. Not ready for Bode to score on them again.

3) Jamie golfing with the boys at Keys on the Green in glorious Evergreen, Colorado. One of the bonuses of playing in the mountains is it’s not uncommon to run into entire herds of elk.

He’s a winner because he’s one of those dudes who poses for a picture an arm’s throw away and didn’t get gouged.

4) While Dad was risking life, limb and backside on the golf course, the kids and I were winners because we bought their Halloween costumes from the local thrift store and went to celebrate the money we saved at Yogurtland.
Oatmeal cookie frozen yogurt? We’re now converts.

5) Playing on Squiggles, a 343-foot “Seasaurus” at the Arvada Center Playground. There were two winners here.

a) The kids delighted in scaling the entirety of Squiggles’ concrete and steel backside and getting sprayed by water misters every hour. Other cool features: The “Talking Trash Cans” that talk back when you throw away garbage, the huge sandbox and three additional concrete sculptures.

b) I was a winner because I bought a book at the thrift store and let the kids play to their heart’s content while I kicked back in the shade and read the entire book.

Last weekend’s’ loser

Jamie, who unceremoniously dumped my cherished Canadian flag chair into the garbage at Bode’s soccer game.

Trashing the hallowed Maple Leaf? He may have avoided The Gouging of the Elk but trust me, he’d better watch his backside because the wife’s wrath is that much worse.

In remembrance

Jamie and I have been watching September 11th features on television all week. It has been a sobering reminder of all that happened to change our world. It’s amazing how someone like me who didn’t know anyone who died and who isn’t even American could still feel personally impacted.

I was working as an event manager at Deseret Book’s corporate offices in Salt Lake City on September 11, 2001. I’d heard about the first attack before going to work and by the time I arrived, people were glued to the televisions in the ZCMI Center’s Food Court. I still remember how surreal it felt to watch it unfold, like you had front-row seats in a horror movie that didn’t end when the lights came back on.

When I was in New York City last summer, I went to Ground Zero. There wasn’t much to see and I guess that’s the point. The site was under reconstruction but one photo I snapped of the many efforts to rebuild still resonates today.


Maybe it’s the optimist in me but I sincerely do not believe the world is inherently bad. Watching the many inspiring stories to come out of the dust testify to that. Last week, the Washington Post interviewed some of the world’s most influential religious leaders about faith in a post-attack world.

“It seems that much of the post-9/11 renewal of faith has waned in the years that have followed,” writes Thomas Monson, president of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. “It should not require tragedy for us to remember God.”

Rabbi David Wolpe writes, “Faith can be turned to evil when people believe that God’s word is made as small as a resentful heart. Faith can be as large as the sky and healing as a lover’s touch when we understand that God wishes goodness.”

“Two of the victims who died in the airplanes that crashed into the twin towers were coming to see me,” writes Deepak Chopra. “Looking back, I feel now the way I did back then, 10 years ago. Catastrophes are not a form of divine punishment, a test from God, evidence of sin, or secret messages from beyond. They are part of our divided world, and such a world reflects our divided self.”

T.D. Jakes writes that the lessons of 9/11 are hidden in plain sight. Among them: “We’ve neglected to comprehend that there is more that unites than separates us.”

To see all the essays, be sure to go here.

And remember.

When the devil comes calling

When I hear about wives who had absolutely no idea their husbands were involved in Ponzi schemes, I get it.

Even though Jamie and I both work from home, he is holed up in his den in the basement up to 15 hours a day while I putter around on the upper two levels of the house.

For the most part, I don’t question what he does. He has always proven to be a trust-worthy Mormon boy and our bills are paid. I mean, the guy is obsessed with pumpkins. How much of a trouble-maker could he be?

Until he received a phone call a few weeks ago. From A WHOLE LOT OF SIN.

In his defense, he claims it was his client, “A Whole Lot of Singing.”

The jury is still out.